Monday, February 25, 2008

NOT KIDDING AROUND.

OK. I CAME HOME FROM WORK TODAY AND IT LOOKED LIKE BRODIE HAD EATEN PARTS OF HIMSELF AND LEFT HUGE PATCHES OF LEFTOVERS ALL OVER THE CARPET. LIKE BIG LOOSE WADS OF HAIR WERE ON THE CARPET. I JUST VACUUMED IT TWO DAYS AGO. IT'S BRAND NEW HAIR. FAST FORWARD. CUT TO. TONIGHT. RIGHT NOW. GETTING IN BED, GETTIN ALL CUDDLY WITH NOBODY EXCEPT MAYBE THE PROSPECTS OF CHECKING MY EMAIL AND, WAIT... HOLD ON A MINUTE. WHAT'S THAT ON THE BLANKET? WHAT COULD THAT BE? I REACHED FOR IT IN ALARM AND QUICKLY REALIZED IT WAS INDEED A HUGE WAD OF THE CAT'S HAIR ON MY BED. THEN I TAKE A CLOSER LOOK AND REALIZE THAT THERE'S NOT JUST A FEW HAIRS AND IT'S NOT JUST THAT ONE WAD. THERE IS A LAYER. ACTUAL LAYER OF CAT HAIR ON THE BLANKET.

I KEEP THE PAINTING IN THE DOORWAY CONSTANTLY.
HOW THE HELL (HELL!) COULD THE CAT HAVE GOTTEN INTO MY ROOM AND SPENT ENOUGH TIME ON MY BED TO HAVE LEFT AN ENTIRE LAYER AND ALSO A BIG LOOSE WAD OF HIS HAIR. SOMETIMES THEY SAY WE'LL NEVER KNOW. IN THIS CASE, I WILL DIE BEFORE I LET THIS MYSTERY GO UN-INVESTIGATED.

UNCOMFORTABLY SIGNING OUT.
NICOLE



THE CULPRIT

7 comments:

iso.bot said...

i've seen that painting in the doorway and let me tell you, that wouldn't even keep clancy out. that is no cat-stopping painting.

nicole said...

i need some answers here. how could that not stop him? what should i do instead? i'm never home! he never leaves!

Charlotte said...

why don't you just close your door when you're not home?

Jessica + Chuck said...

what did you say earlier about us staying in a hotel this weekend?

nicole said...

well that is exactly what i have been doing. keeping my door shut. it just sucks because there are two windows in the whole apartment and one of them is in my room the other in kiersten's. so, the whole house is do dark all day because kiersten's room isso far away from the rest of the house. anyway, i'm doing what i can. but i did wake up one morning cause i heard a noise and looked over and the cat had just jumped over the painting and was staring at me stricken with fear. i don't think he expected to find me there at all. it was terrible. i ran over and he jumped back over the painting and i slammed my door on his butt. evil.

Jessica + Chuck said...

the next time i will be staying in the hotel WITH CHUCK and you and of course Kiersten is welcome to join us. Im sorry if im spelling that beautiful name wrong. i love that darling boy brodie but i can't be around him next time. :( sorry i was so lame.

skbproductions said...

Yes, you need to close your door. Completely close it. Cats jump, it's what they do, and your room and bed are like the grand hotel for the cat. And it will only bother your alergies.

Shutyour door totally if you can.

mom